Thomas Andrews: A Tragic Romance
by comejosephine16
Summary: Not meant to be interactive just being creative. I did some editing on it which I realized it desperatly needed. So, please review. This story is meant for girls because of the romance but boys can read it too,obviously Disclaimer: I don't own anything!
1. Chapter 1

"You are right, darling, a very grand ship, indeed." Stepping out of our motor vehicle onto the ports of Southampton, England I saw a ship so grand in scale and so luxurious that it made the other boats and "ships" around it look like toy boats and ships. This was _Titanic_, the _RMS Titanic_. "They say that she was designed in Belfast by an Irishman by the name of Thomas Andrews. Fifteen thousand Irishmen built this ship, as I understand it."

But my fiancé was hardly listening to me. "_ come, we must be on our way, we don't want to be tardy, you know and your Mother and Aunt Margaret are waiting for us at the ramp for the first class passengers.

He offered me his hand and I reluctantly took it. He may have been my fiancé but I did not love him and we were to be married in America at month's end. This voyage was to be one of reluctance and my last time as a "free" woman. I was only eighteen and my mother (who had always taken foolish living ideas from the Dewitt Buckaters) wished me to marry a certain Mr. Jonathan Morgan. He was very wealthy and his father had a successful business in textile factories. He was to take over that job when his stuffy father died. In the meantime, he would gamble on horse races and talk politics and business with "great men."

The port was crowded with people of all ages, ethnicities and class. We headed swiftly to the first class ramp and I watched as the lower class people went onto the lower decks. Our bags were immediately taken to the ships interior and as I met my mother; Victoria _ and my Aunt Margaret _ we were welcomed by an officer; "Welcome to _Titanic_!"

We moved onto our rooms. I observed beautifully crafted walls, ceilings with arcs, elevators, fine carpets and many wealthy, well-dressed respectable people crowded about. Jon saw a man whom he had, had a business relation with and began discussing matters with him. I looked about as I watched my mother and aunt approach a woman; The Countess of Roth's. At this moment I noticed a very handsome man who was writing in a small black book. He looked deeply intrigued in whatever he was doing and I noticed he was quite obviously a first class passenger well-dressed in a handsome gray suit. My eyes strayed to a wall near him; I observed a particularly lovely oil painting on the wall nearest the doors to the smoking room for first class. I approached it. The painting was of a bright open sea and a glorious sunset that looked so real that it took everything in my power not to put my hand to the painting in hope that perhaps I might feel that sun and smell that ocean.

I was pulled from my trance by a handsome voice. I could tell the man was Irish right away because of his accent. "Hello, Miss. It's beautiful, isn't it?" It was the handsome man I had seen not moments ago. His dark brown eyes looked gently into my green and I suddenly relaxed. "Yes," I said, "It's lovely, I adore the ocean and I love seeing paintings like this one. Who is the artist?"

"I believe it is a Monet." He turned to me again and smiled, extending a hand. "My name is Thomas Andrews." He took my hand and kissed it gently. My heart fluttered and a blush was coming to my cheeks.

"My name is _ _; I have heard of you, you designed Titanic."

"Yes, I did." He said all too modestly, "I hope you enjoy your journey to America, _."

"Thank you, Mr. Andrews."

"Please, call me Thomas."

His smile made me smile and I blushed, again. "Thomas."

"Dear, dear please we must get to our rooms." Jon stood their impatiently and the man he had been talking to was beginning to walk away. "I am coming, darling." Jon approached us and acknowledged Thomas. "It's a Pleasure, sir."

As I made introductions I said to Jon, "Thomas Andrews is the man who designed Titanic."

"Ah!" he said, with great enthusiasm, "A great pleasure, sir! What a feat! I do hope you will join us at our table tonight so we may discuss your work further."

Thomas eyed me then said, "Of course, thank you."

"Good, Come _."

As I walked off with Jon I felt the happy fluttering feeling disperse. I looked back at Thomas and he smiled at me, tipped his tin gallon hat and walked towards the elevators. Now, that was a gentleman.


	2. Chapter 2

I met my maids; Lucy and Mary and they assisted me in unpacking my things. The sitting room connected my room to Jon's and my mother's to my aunt's. Our suite was one of the finest on the ship at least that's what Jon had repeatedly said to me.

Lucy assisted me in changing my clothes for the afternoon, dinner would be a few more hours and I wanted to go out to the boat deck. "This is lovely miss, if you don't mind my saying," she said as she selected a dress of an opaque pale blue from my wardrobe and brought it over to where I was standing.

Other frocks were laid gently out on hangers and on the bed. "Yes," I remarked, "I'll wear this and could you please lay out my green silk gown for dinner, the one with the diamonds on it?"

"Yes, miss."

I put my mahogany hair up in a clip that let half of my hair flow down my back in large, soft curls. The clip was a shell and it was by far my favorite. I put on my coat and gloves and retreated to the boat deck. The sun was just beginning to fall into the ocean, sunset and I was prepared to soak up what I could. The smell of the ocean and the gentle breeze ignited my senses. I looked about the deck and saw the third class passengers on the lower deck below me and many first class people around me gazing at this and that and engaging in mindless chatter.

"Hello, _." I turned and saw Thomas Andrews standing before me a few feet away.

"Thomas." I said smiling I walked to him. "He rested his hands on the rail and stood beside me. In his left hand was the small black book.

"Are you enjoying you trip so far?"

"Oh yes," I said, "The boat is extraordinary." I looked into his eyes which looked more hazel in the setting sun. "It must be quite an accomplishment for you to be standing on your creation, a work of art, really."

"Well," he said with a chuckle, "I can hardly call this ship mine, financially anyway. It belongs to Mr. Bruce Ismay. You've heard of him I'm sure?"

"Yes, as I understand it, I'll be dining with him tonight." I studied Thomas' expression. "But he did not create her, you did. He merely had the idea and possibly the funds."

"Well, I put her together, that's true but with the help of many men."

"Yes, I have researched the ship I was to voyage. It took eight months?"

Thomas looked at me and smiled shaking his head slightly. "Amazing. I must say I am very impressed. Most people only notice what is right in front of them and do not look in depth as to what is really there."

"That's very unfortunate, but yes it's true," I said looking out to the sea.

"I am glad to know that you see more." He responded smiling. "You're clearly contrary to those around you."

I turned my body to him and gazed at him still further. "You are too. I have never met a modest first class gentleman before, especially one whose modesty is hardly necessary considering what you've accomplished."

He turned to me and gazed at me. "This ship has its flaws, flaws I hope to correct before our next voyage."

I studied him closely and his eyes looked wistful. He looked deeply into my green eyes and then, as if realizing what he had just said, His glance averted mine and he almost looked as though he regretted what he had just said. A few moments later I knew that he did.

"Forgive me," he was clearly trying to change the subject, "It really is none of my business but Jon Morgan, is he your-"

"Fiancé? Yes, he is." I said solemnly.

He must have noticed the smile fading on my face because he asked, "Are you alright?"

I looked at him. His eyes tinged with concern, for me. "Yes, it's just," I couldn't think of what to say, my heart began to beat rapidly and I came to the startled realization of what he just said. He cared. "No one has ever looked at me the way you do. Forgive me, but no one has ever asked me if I was alright, if I cared, what my opinion is. I have never had anyone in my life that actually has cared about me and my wants." I turned my gaze back to the sea.

"I care. You can tell me." He was being serious. I had barely known this man for a few hours and already he was asking me to spill out my fears, my worries, my sorrow.

I started walking towards the bow section of the ship and Thomas followed. "It's everything, Thomas. I mean, I shouldn't be acting this way, bothering you. I don't want to marry Jon," I was spilling, "and I don't think I love him. It's my mother and everyone else who congratulates us and says that was splendid, that we are supposed to be together." I could feel something boiling inside me.

"_, I have known you but a few hours and I know this may be hard to hear from someone who is practically a stranger but please, don't let them control you, make your choices for you." He was practically begging me to reconsider.

I could feel tears coming to my eyes. The tenderness of his voice and his hands of my arms made me feel secure and I wanted him, no one else but him. I hardly realized what I was slipping into and I didn't know why all of a sudden this man was changing me. "Thomas, I can't my mother wants me too."

His hands moved to my face gently his fingers touched my rosy cheeks his brown eyes searched my green and he was close, so close. I wanted to kiss him so badly. His eyes shifted as if had just realized what he had done.

He stepped back. He would not do it. Not when I was engaged and not when everything was moving so quickly. I can't describe what I felt but it was what I wanted. "I must go _, forgive me, but I promised Mr. Ismay I would-"

"Its fine, go ahead. I must go dress for dinner."

As I turned to leave Thomas beckoned me, "Wait." He stepped towards me, not as close as before but close enough for my heart to beat heavily again. "It would be a privilege and an honor for me if you would allow me to escort you to dinner tonight." It was as if he couldn't help it.

He took my hand and I smiled fondly at him, "The honor is mine." He smiled brilliantly and said, "I will meet you at the painting and we'll meet your party." He turned looking back once and I left the docks.


	3. Chapter 3

I gazed in the mirror, my figure clutched tightly within cloth and corset. A knock on my door startled me and I said, "Come in, please."

My mother stood their looking like a million dollars in a red and black dress. "I understand you and Jon met Thomas Andrews today, splendid. We shall be having dinner with them and the Dewitt Buckaters, their daughter is about your age darling, first time you'll be meeting them."

"You mean those movie stars you persistently speak about?" I said with a snarky tone. Not that I had anything against the Dewitt Bukaters but the way my mother cherished them was sickening.

"_, don't act foolish now come we must go to dinner." She turned to leave but stopped in the doorway, "Jon is escorting you I'm sure?"

"Would you rather he escort you? Perhaps that would be more appropriate." I said nonchalantly.

My mother stared at him sternly. She knew it was true. She cared for Jon Morgan more than I ever would but the thought of my mother marrying my fiancé despite my feelings for him was rather a nauseating thought.

"No," I said looking at her reflection in the mirror. "I have an escort for dinner tonight."

Before my mother could continue I left the room.

As I entered the grand hall I saw the clock on the mantle of the grand staircase. It was beautiful. At the bottom of the stairs I saw Thomas Andrews. He was as handsome as ever in his kindly pressed suit. He looked upon me as if I were an angel descending from heaven.

_God, she is beautiful… _he thought, his eyes looked deeply into mine and he smiled. For some unknown reason I stopped in the middle of the stairway.

Thomas began to ascend it as he came closer I felt myself moving forward again. He took my hand and drew me close, whispering in my ear he said, "I will meet you every time, and you won't have to go all the way alone."

He kissed my hand and extended his arm to me. I felt like I was melting, his touch was gentle and I felt like I was a priceless treasure to him. How could this have happened so suddenly?

We entered the dining room and were immediately greeted by the Dewitt Buckaters and Molly Brown. My mother saw me with Mr. Andrews and worry as well as disgust ignited in her eyes.

An attractive girl with the reddest curliest hair I had ever seen smiled politely at me. "Rose Dewitt Buckater," she said. "Pleasure, "I returned.

As we began to sit down my mother eyed me sternly and I knew this meant that I must sit next to my fiancé.

Thomas sat on the opposite side of the table which only enhanced discretion.

Dinner conversation centered on various subjects and Thomas and I made eye contact almost the entire time. Afterward, I stood and the men went to the smoking room. Thomas came to me and said softly so that only I could hear, "Will you meet me tomorrow morning?"

"Of course, Thomas." I smiled and he bent down to kiss my hand. "Tomorrow will be better, you'll see."

He left the room but did not go to the smoking room I assumed he was going to his room.

The remainder of the night I thought about nothing but Thomas, the way it felt when he touched me and the way he kissed my hand, if only he would kiss my lips…


	4. Chapter 4

The next morning I woke early and dressed. Jon wanted to have breakfast on the private promenade deck we had. "It's lovely out here." Trying to find something to say to this man I scarcely knew.

"I hoped you would join me last night." He said changing the subject entirely.

"What do you mean?"

He set down his coffee and the Lucy came in "Anything else, sir?"

"Mm." he shook his head still staring at me harshly.

Lucy left.

"We are soon to be married, honor and respect for me is essential." He glowered.

"What are you talking about?" I asked I truly didn't understand what had brought this up.

"I saw you with Andrews on the deck last evening and I saw you with him at dinner."

"We were with many people at dinner, T-Mr. Andrews included." I felt a sudden distaste for this man. "Spying on me then were you? Yesterday? On the decks."

"You cannot go gallivanting around with other men when you are my betrothed! You obviously cannot be trusted alone." He simmered a little then leaned forward, cruel rage in his eyes." I deserve the utmost respect from you!

"Will you soon respect me, then? You are not the only contribution to this marriage." I said all too boldly.

Jon stood; He flared and slapped my face hard. Wincing I turned away from him. "You will honor me!" He stood down, stiffly he said, "I will not be made a fool of, do you understand?"

"Y-yes." This was all I could utter.

"I hope so." He went towards the door. "Excuse me; we'll have lunch in the dining room at noon."

Walking away like it was no problem for him. That bastard. Was he right? Was it my fault? Was I supposed to be happy with a man like him? Ignore Thomas?

Stunned I felt my cheek, it still stung but that was nothing compared to what he said, what hate fired in his eyes. Was it hate? It was cruel…

That late afternoon I saw Thomas Andrews standing on the decks writing in his book. I stood there for a good few minutes contemplating on whether or not I should talk to him. I had promised him.

"Hello Thomas. What is that, may I ask?" I tried to sound cheerful but I couldn't help but wonder if Jon was somewhere around. Hopefully, he wouldn't notice my stung cheek.

"What happened to your cheek, _?" his gentle face flooded with concerned curiosity. He had noticed.

"Oh, uh I must have done something without noticing."

He moved his hand gently over the bruise. "Does it hurt?"

I winced a little but covered it well. 'Not really, I hardly noticed it."

He smiled and kissed my cheek where the bruise was.

"Please tell me about the book," I said blushing. "Is it a record keeping book for_ Titanic_?"

He smiled broadly, "Yes, it is my journal, in a way." He started walking alongside me and again that feeling of joy and safety fell upon me. "I make it a point to fill out, everyday, things that I see need to be fixed or additional components I want to add on. I also hope that I can fill more lifeboats in."

"Are there not enough now?"

"About half actually." He looked a little nervous. "Thomas, forgive me, but is that what you meant yesterday about the ship being flawed?"

"That amongst other things," he said this nonchalantly and smiled gently. "Not to worry, she has all the lifeboats you need, I have built a good ship and she has water tight doors on the lower decks."

"Water tight doors?"

"Yes, would you like to see a blueprint of the ship?"

"Yes, I would love to." This was actually quite interesting for me and I loved the idea of seeing Thomas' charts, data, and blueprints of the ship.

He took my hand and led me to the A deck rooms his was down the port corridor on the left. He took a key out of his pocket and unlocked the door. His room was a beautiful first class room. Maps, charts, and folders were placed about the room near the desk especially.

"It is rather untidy," he said sheepishly

"It's wonderful." I went to the desk where I saw some papers, charts and notes. "Thomas, this is your work?" I asked curiously.

He came over to the desk a tint of red appeared on his handsome face. "May I?" I asked.

"Of course, here." He said opening a folder and a portfolio file.

These files were filled with drawings, notes about parts of the ships and improvements as well as additions to be made.

"You're amazing, you are."

"Thank you; it is only my work, dear. Any man with the proper amount of education could accomplish this."

"No," I took his hand in mine and pulled him in, "It takes more than intelligence, with you, it was imagination to construct and design such a fabulous ocean liner." I turned to the blueprints, "look at how hard you worked."

He leaned closer into me. I put my hand to his cheek and slid it down to the side of his neck I knew his heart was beating faster than mine; I could feel his pulse.

His hands stayed on my hand and he whispered, "Tonight, meet me at the painting."

"I will."

He distanced himself from me again and I found I could breathe again.


	5. Chapter 5

"Come Josephine in my flying machine, and it's up she goes, up she goes."

"Thomas!" I laughed and he danced me around the boat deck. "May I put my hands here?'

He gestured towards my waist. I nodded grinning and rather hesitantly and gently he put a hand on my waist and took the other hand in his own. "Balance yourself like a bird on a beam in the air she goes, there she goes." I sang and he gazed at me.

We ballroom danced on the deck for a moment then he stopped. I looked towards the sky and saw millions, billions of stars. They were more beautiful than anything as they peppered the sky and put the gorgeous moon to shame. "The stars are spectacular." I said to him.

"Your eyes put those very stars to shame," he said smiling.

I looked at him and he nodded slowly, "every time I see your eyes I think of stars or emeralds. I know I should not feel for you like I do but you have affected me like no other human being."

"Thomas, I don't love him. It's alright-"

He took my hands, "Nevertheless, you are engaged-"

"Thomas, please," gently I took my hand and turned his face towards mine and I saw worry in his face. "I care too much about you and I feel nothing for Jon, it's you I-" His face drew closer by now we were standing at the very front of the ship on the bow section.

_You shouldn't she's engaged…she doesn't deserve you… too innocent… too beautiful, don't! _Thomas battled with himself but gently very drew his hands to my face and I put my hands just below his shoulders. His lips brushed gently, effortlessly against mine. I moved my lips across his; this was like nothing I had ever experienced. I wanted him, wanted this.

His lips reluctantly released mine and his brown eyes pierced mine. "I love you, _"

I put my hands on his face and kissed him once more. "I love you, Thomas Andrews."

The next morning I woke in my bed. A night to remember no doubt I thought of Thomas. His touch, his lips, and his sincerity something I found all other gentlemen, lacking.


	6. Chapter 6

"Oh, no I was born in Ireland. I recently came to England but I've only been there a few months and this was because _Titanic_ was finished and I needed time to look over the construction, files and such." Thomas and I were walking on the first class decks the next afternoon and as fascinated as I was about his work, I found most of it to be what I expected. An intelligent man, who dreamed of being something that only others could barely grasp in their minds, he made his dreams a reality. "You have accomplished a great deal in your lifetime. I'm sure many men admire your determination and resourcefulness."

He turned to me and smiled. "Well, I have the skill and the ideas but despite this I didn't have the money until just recently. I would be a second class passenger on a ship if _Titanic_ was not created."

"In a way your creation allowed you to strive on?"

"Yes, still, it isn't my own."

"Some refinement you want to make." I started "Surely, refinements are up to the man who created the ship."

"Not entirely, I'm afraid. Mr. Ismay is the financial owner which in this situation makes him the last person to decide and the first person to know about _Titanic_."

"That seems rather unfair to you."

He turned his eyes downward towards his black notebook. "He's been very generous with most projects and my ideas concerning the ship."

He turned his gaze from the book he was holding to my eyes again "I am being extremely impolite, here we are speaking of me and my work and I have heard hardly anything about you."

"Me? What could I possibly have to say?"

He chuckled, "surely you have had dreams, ambitions."

I smiled and looked towards the sea. "What?" he asked looking at me still.

"I have always wanted to do something of substance. Perhaps be an actress, a signer, a sailor-"

"A-a sailor!" he laughed "Quite the dream, I would not expect that of a first class woman but I can see that you love this ship, and the sea-"

Looking at him again I said, "I have seen many places in Europe, been to America twice and I still haven't done everything I wanted to do. Yet, being on this ship has changed my point of view as to what I want to do, and see."

"You are smart. Don't rush, you shall find a passion somewhere, I know. You express yourself in what you do. I mean dancing with you was quite the entertainment. I could hardly lead!"

I laughed at this and when the horn sounded for dinner I didn't want to go. Thomas gazed at me for a second then took me by the hand to the front of the ship. At the very front he stood and then knelt to the ground and took his hand in his hat. "Thomas?" I questioned and I wondered immediately, _was he going to propose? Perhaps it was something else… _It was. "_ _, I love you, and I want you to take my ship."

"What? But Thomas, it's yours and Mr. Ismay-"

"It is mine in part and Mr. Ismays in part, but you love this ship, I can see it, and I know you never want to leave it, leave me. But you are to be married-"

"I won't Thomas, I can't marry him-"

He took my hand and kissed it, "I know I know you won't and I to be frank don't want you to."

He gazed at me and said suddenly, "I promise you that as long as _Titanic_ sails the oceans and seas, you will be with your true love, in heart, mind, and soul even if you are not together in body. You will find him,-"

"I found you-"

"-and he will care for you like no one else. You will be happy and together." Then he paused. "If _Titanic _ever sinks, gets destroyed or lost at sea, do not fear. You will know then that you have truly found him and that he will be yours and only yours forever. You will be together even after you pass on from this life; I want you to hear this because you are an independent young woman who deserves the very best there is in life. I want you to know that _Titanic _is truly your ship and your life and that even after you depart from me and this ship; you will still be on the ship in your heart and you will be in my heart." He kissed my hand and said, "Promise me that you will have _Titanic_."

At these words I went to my knees so that we were both on our knees on the deck of the ship now sparkling gold in the bright sunset. As the ocean dropped into the sea I kissed his hands and looked up at him. "I promise, _Titanic_ will be mine and you will always be in my heart."

We knelt there on the deck and he gently kissed my lips. Passerbies needn't notice us nor did they I'm sure, they went to dinner and I stayed on the deck with Thomas for a short, magical while. He was my true love, I was sure of it.


	7. Chapter 7

"…In the eyes of God, she belongs to Thomas Andrews…" Dinner was somewhat interesting tonight. I found Jack Dawson to be a very nice person with a lot of lessons to teach people about life and living to the fullest.

Thomas and I were sitting across from each other again and he had promised to take my down to the third class decks tonight because he wanted me to join the Irish party they were having.

"To making it count..." Rose said raising her glass.

"To making it count many echoed including me and Thomas who smiled at me as he drank." I returned the smile and when dinner was over The Cornel said, "Join me in brandy gentlemen?" Thomas rose and came to me while Jack went to Rose to say goodnight. "I think she fancies him." I whispered to Thomas he turned to see Rose watching Jack walk away.

"Yes, I can see that." He said smiling, "I don't see that Cal particularly appreciates that."

He offered his hand and I willingly took it. "Where are we going?" I asked. "You'll see, not to worry. You'll love it just promise me that you'll let me lead this time."

"What?" I said laughing.

My golden yellow dress set my eyes off to advantage and my dark curls were held back in combs. Jon eyed us suspiciously as we left and he hurried off to have brandy with the other gentlemen. It was as if he knew there was nothing he could do about it, at least not yet.

We went down to the third class dining room where loud Irish music was played by a quartet of third class people. Many were dancing and others were playing cards, some men were arm wrestling and some women were talking to other women and men in corners of the room and at tables with drinks.

As the next song started Thomas took my hand and I was on the dance floor with another third class passengers. They didn't seem bothered by our presence. As the music began Thomas took my waist and we danced across the floor twirling and stepping according to the music. "I don't know how to dance to this." I laughed

"I've got you, I'll lead." He grinned. He swirled me across the floor. "Thomas! No!" I said laughing

He laughed and we spun around on the dance floor. "You alright?"

I nodded smiling

"Okay, here we go."

We went through a line of people on each side of us raising their arms above us. As the music continued to play I found myself lost in the fun, the music, in Thomas' arms. I saw Jack and Rose dancing on the platform in the middle of the room.

"Two of hearts," said a man at the table nearest us. Thomas and I were sitting at a table drinking cheap beer while the men next to us were playing poker. "Play your Jack." I said,

"I can't miss, I only have these!" he showed me his hands in worry.

"They're bluffing." I whispered. "You play that card, they can't win." He did and immediately the men groaned.

They all laid down their hands and the man I had helped jumped up. "Whoo hoo! Yes! I won it back! I won it back!" He laughed and Thomas smiled and laughed without a sound muffling an outburst no less. I turned to him and he sat up from leaning his back to the chair and shook his head. "You played poker before?"

"Its luck of the draw," I said drinking from my glass.

By eleven o' clock Thomas and I were out on the ship's deck again. "It's beautiful out tonight as it was last night I suppose." I was wearing Thomas' long trench coat and gazing up at the star filled sky, the moon and silt of ivory pressed in the sky. No clouds, a gentle breeze. Thomas took my hands and wrapped his strong arms around me. His breath misted up and his voice was a whisper in my ear. "And it's up she goes, up she goes…" I turned my head to him and his lips touched mine again. It was like I was floating and our skin glowed in the moonlight. "Come with me Thomas…" I requested this, it was not a command.

He followed me to his room and his face was calm. His room was dark. Only the fireplace emitted a light from the fire and I turned on the lights. They were calm and beautiful. His room was warm and so was my body. "Wait," I said and I moved into his room and shut the door.

He was not perplexed; he sat at his desk while awaiting my presence again. I could do this; I would do this because I wanted him. I released what remained in the clip of my dark hair and the curls bounced freely about my shoulders. My eyes sparkled and I grabbed Thomas' coat I released my body from my dress, shall, gloves, corset and under garments. My body fully exposed, warm and soft. I put Thomas' coat on and opened the door. He was sitting at his desk. Laid back against the chair he looked at me in at first a way of preparation for anything I was about to say or do but then his face looked softer more amazed until the instant I slipped off his coat button by button. He gazed in awe at my sleek, slender body and stuttered, "Wha- what? Is this? You- you." I went towards him the coat still slung about my shoulders. He stood and I kissed his lips in greed. His lips kissed mine in passion and thankful acceptance. "You, you are certain?"

"Yes, Thomas. I am."

"He led me to his bedroom and took off his tie, his shirt. Still looking at me I stood there, fully ready for what I was about to see. My body relaxed as he finally stepped forward completely released from his clothes. Standing there we kissed. On the bed we he felt my body. I guided him with my hands. I could tell he was nervous at first but he was so gentle, he felt so good his body in mine, on mine. I felt it all I was hot I closed my eyes and I felt it all. My body tensed then relaxed he let out a deep breath and fell to the chest. "That was magical." I stated in heavy breaths. "You were too." He breathed and laid his head upon my chest I knew he could hear the pounding of my heart. I closed my eyes and dreamed of him again.


	8. Chapter 8

I felt something on my cheek, lips Thomas' lips. "Good morning, lovely." I was under the covers and I opened my eyes a cool sea salt breeze fell to my face and I could tell that it was morning by the light streaming through the room. "Thomas," I sat up letting the blanket fall. "Where are my clothes?"

"Here's a robe. You'll need a new change of clothes, I'm sure but they're over there." He pointed to the wardrobe. They were still on the floor I glanced at them and chuckled Thomas did too and I put on the robe. I stood up and he came to me kissing me on the forehead. "You foolish girl," he said softly.

"I wanted it, I know you did too."

I left him in my clothes of that evening. "I will meet you after church."

"Very good," he said as he put on a new tie "I'll be around, you should see me." He came to the door, kissed me and I left.

"_Eternal Father, strong to save, whose arm hath bound the restless wave, who bidd'st the mighty ocean deepits own appointed limits keep; oh, hear us when we cry to Thee, for those in peril on the sea!_" We sang _Eternal father, strong to save_ in the chapel at church, this particular hymn was one of my favorites but I found very little interest in church today. I couldn't stop thinking about Thomas.

"_, will you join us for a tour on the boat deck?" Rose asked me as she gathered with her mother Cal and Mr. Andrews. "I really must see Jon he's been a bit perturbed lately." I waved slightly to Thomas who winked and tipped his hat. I left and went to my mother. "Come to tea and then we'll speak."

I went to Jon and he looked stern I hadn't seen him in church. "Where were you?"

"Where were _you_?" He said, taking a seat in the dining room opposite me. "I was asleep."

"Clearly not, I went to your room or rather knocked on the door, I would never enter a woman's room uninvited. You did not answer."

"I was asleep, Jon."

"In your own room I suppose?"

"Yes, in my own room. Where else would I be?" I looked at him in retort "Where else would I possibly sleep? On the deck?"

"Then why didn't you answer last night, God damnit?"

"I was sleeping and I was very tired, honestly Jon let's just have our tea there's something I must tell you."

He sipped his tea and remarked "Lamb; rare, no sauce, salad, and no anchovies."

"I have come to a decision that I believe will benefit both of us."

He reached for a cigarette. I leaned forward. "Mind if I?"

He looked at me in surprise though his expression was still sick and anger filled. I had smoked before but he didn't know that. "Certainly." He responded stiffly.

He handed me a cigarette and I put it in my holder. I puffed it and he smiled. "We will make a wonderful couple." It was as if my asking for a cigarette had been like asking him for his love.

"I don't believe so. I need you to understand something. I am not in love with you and I think that my mother-"

"I asked you, your mother agreed this is between her and I now and you have no reason to believe that we should not be together, do you understand me?"

"I am not a man in your father's factory that you can command and I am not an animal for sale."

"I will not be made a fool of, _." He stood up and left when his food came I sent it back. I hate lamb without sauce.


	9. Chapter 9

I went out onto the deck. The sun was sinking low in the sky. There was no wind and it was getting colder and I buttoned my coat. I went to the railing and looked down at the sea. No waves, no breaking water against the bow.

"_?"

"Thomas."

He came towards me smiling. "Close your eyes." I did. "Keep them closed and don't open them until I tell you to."

"I won't I promise." I could hear his footsteps as he walked nearer to me and he stepped behind me I felt his hands move my thick curls away from my neck and onto my shoulder. His hand gently touched my neck and so did something else. A necklace? He brushed his face against my hair and whispered, "Okay, open your eyes." I looked down; in his hand was a ship, _Titanic_, a smaller but very accurate version of Titanic and it gleamed in the light. The stern bow and viewed starboard section all measured out in precision. A glittering pair of medium-small diamonds glinted bright as stars on the front of the bow section. "Oh Thomas! But-"

"I had it made yesterday; a jeweler on the ship took two six karat diamonds and put them in this pearl ship."

"Pearl?"

"Yes, I told _Titanic_ would belong to you."

We embraced once again and I held him close as he held me. "II won't leave you, Thomas. When the ship docks I'm staying with you."

"This is amazing. I don't understand." He said laughing

"Neither do I!" I exclaimed laughing. "For once, something in my life that I have wanted that I chose."


	10. Chapter 10

"Are you coming?" I stood in the doorway with my nightgown in hand. I was wearing my evening dress; a deep green with lace and satin. My dinner dress was back in my room and I had changed after an evening with my mother, aunt and Jon as well as Thomas, the Cornel and Ruth Dewitt Buckater. Rose had not been there but Cal had.

"Yes, I'll be there soon. It's starting to get cooler so go ahead. I'll be there I just need to go over these."

"Clear." Said Captain Smith

"Yes, I don't think I've ever seen such a flat calm."

"Like a mill pond, not a breath of wind." Smith responded though his humor had a tinge of agitation in it.

"It will make the bergs hard to see…with no breaking water at the base."

"Mm," said Smith. He fidgeted with the lemon in his tea. "Well, I'm off maintain speed and heading with the light on."

"Yes, sir."

At eleven thirty pm I woke up for some unknown reason. I hadn't changed and I was still in my evening dress. I went to the window in the room.

The stars sparkled like the diamonds on my necklace and the ocean was still. I looked at the clock 11:40pm a sudden jolt and a grinding noise. I noticed the lamp was shaking on the bed stand and everything else in the room for that matter. I hurried out o the room Thomas was sitting at his desk holding a wine glass and papers down looking up at the crystal lamp which shook. "I believe the ship hit something."

"Yes," he hurried to the wardrobe. "I must see the Captain, immediately." He put on his coat and went across the room towards me, gazing in my eyes with worry he said. "Darling, stay here, I'll be back in a moment's time."

"Alright."

"This is most unfortunate Captain!" said Mr. Ismay as he entered the room. "Water, fourteen feet above the keel in ten minutes, in the forepeak, in all three holds, and in boiler room six." Thomas' voice was tinged with fear, beads of sweat appeared on his face. He knew what was going to happen. _Titanic _was a doomed Maiden of the Sea.

"When can we get underway, damnit?"  
>"That's five compartments! She can stay afloat with the first four compartments breached, but not five, not five. As she goes down by the head, the water will spill over the tops of the bulkheads at E deck from one to the next. Back and back. There's no stopping It."<br>"The pumps... if we opened the doors..."  
>"The pumps buy you time, but minutes only. From this moment, no matter what we do, <em>Titanic<em> will founder."  
>"But this ship can't sink!"<br>"She's made of iron, sir! I assure you, she can... and she will. It is a mathematical certainty."  
>"How much time?"<br>"An hour... two at most."  
>"And how many aboard, Mr. Murdoch?"<br>"2,200 souls on board, sir."  
>"Well, I believe you may get your headlines, Mr. Ismay."<p>

I was still in the room changing back into fresh garments, a pale pink dress with a lovely body design, one of my personal favorites. I hoped that the ship had just had ruttier problems but Thomas looked scared when I saw him. I heard a knock on the door and thinking it was Thomas I rushed to answer it. The door had been locked and the key was with me.

To my dismay, a steward stood at the door. "Oh, Miss _! What are you doing here? No time, no time. Here, put your lifebelt on, not to worry. I'm sure it's just a precaution." He hurried away. I put on the lifebelt, this was certainly no precaution. Thomas knew the ship was sinking; lifebelts would not be issued otherwise.

"Thomas!" I cried looking left and right for the man.

…..

Thomas Andrews left the room quickly with many crew members on his heels. The Captain left to send out an SOS and the rumor about the ship sinking was spreading quickly. All crew members knew what had happened by now and were going everyone on the ship banging on doors and walking down halls telling people to put on their lifebelts. He went outside to see that the Crew was quickly cutting the chains off the lifeboats, no passengers. "Mr. Wiles!" He called desperately. "Where are the passengers?" "They all went back inside…" Thomas looked at his watch, _God damn, so little time left_.

"Put your lifebelt on, sir!" a steward hurried down the hall.

Many crew members were lacking lifebelts but almost all first class passengers had them on or were putting them on despite their weariness and questions.

Thomas Andrews went back to his room. Seeing that I had left, he hurried down the halls. Into the dining room he walked, looking this way and that trying to find me.

"Care for a drink, sir?" asked a plump steward. Thomas proceeded out into the grand hall where the grand staircase was before him.

He began to walk up the stairs when a voice said, "Mr. Andrews, I saw the iceberg, and I see it in your eyes. Please tell me the truth."

He stepped down, he must tell Rose, and she was a good friend. "The ship will sink."

She looked strained, "You are certain?"

He looked to the grand staircase. "Yes, in an hour or so, all this will be at the bottom of the Atlantic."

Caledon Hockley looked at him in dumb confusion. "What?"

"Please, tell only who you must, I don't want to be responsible for a panic, and get to a boat, quickly, don't wait. You remember what I told you about the boats."

"Yes, I understand." she said. He proceeded up the stairs, slowly. _Foolish, My God, what have I done? _Fear was inside him but so was concern, for me. He heard a voice calling his name. Turning he saw me and dashed down the hall to me. "Thank God! Where were you, _?" He kissed me and I responded with, "Steward told me to put on a lifebelt and I knew then that it was true, the ship hit something and were sinking. How much time?"

He looked deep into my eyes, "An hour maybe two."

"My God…"

"_, you must get to a boat, right away."

"What? Without you?" I was taken aback; I would not get on any boat without Thomas. "Yes, _ you must. Please, dear get to the boat deck right away!"

"Thomas, I won't go without you. I won't. Please, I want to help."

He shook his head in dismay but said, "Very well, but you will stay on A deck and tell people where to go depending on where they're at. You remember the maps I showed you of the decks?"

"Of course, Thomas."

"Good. I will be going to B and C decks to warn second class passengers."

"What about third class?"

_Oh God, the gates… _He paused for a moment, Mr. Ismays requested that the gates be close, surely they would be. "I'll go down their when I've cleared out the second class passengers."

"Very well." I turned to leave but he called out "_!"

I turned his lips touched mine; it was as if he couldn't get enough of me. "I love you. Please, be careful and for God's sake put on a lifebelt! You also must promise me that you will get on a lifebelt when the water reaches at most 'B deck.' Even if you don't see me get on the boats, do you understand?"

"I promise."


	11. Chapter 11

I saw my mother and aunt getting into a lifeboat and my fiancé saw me and ran towards me. "Where in God's name were you? Come with me." He grabbed my arm and led me towards the boat where my mother and aunt were now seated. "_, thank heavens! Come quickly, dear." Said my mother "No mother, I have to help, there aren't enough lifeboats, not enough by half. Many innocent people are going to die tonight I have to help as me as I can, give them a chance."

"Darling, you cannot I won't let you. They aren't worth the breath you're wasting"

"Let me, _let me?_" I gave her a disgusted look. "They're people too, mother, even if they're not first class old money people."

My fiancé scowled at me. I dashed away from the boats and left my mother and aunt there to cry out my name.

I hurried down the halls telling people where to go. "You are not a crew member," said one woman

"I am helping, Madame please go to the lifeboats you must hurry they'll soon fill."

The ship was tilting steadily. Thomas went outside, "Mr. Lightholler!" he called in aggravation. "Why are the boats being launched half full?"

Mr. Lightholler turned and said, "Not now Mr. Andrews!"

The boats being launched half full were unacceptable! There weren't enough boats as it was. Rose had come to Thomas earlier and was now with Jack on the decks. Outside people were beginning to panic and almost all the boats were gone from the starboard section. Boats were being brought down from the higher decks with great difficulty and many men were forced to let their wives go alone or with their children. They watched in great pain and worry wondering if this would be the last time they'd ever speak.

The Orchestra was beginning to lose its cheerful tune and some third class people that were eradicated from the lower decks were awaiting a lifeboat. Many people were confused, children were separated from their parents and the crew was trying very hard to keep order and the passengers calm while the "filled" the boats.

I moved through the plethora of first second and third class passengers and crew. I searched for Thomas everywhere but I couldn't find him through the mass. I did, however; see Captain Smith who stood like a statue observing the chaos and the fear. I couldn't believe this but I felt little pity for the man. Ismay must have put him up to it, but honestly, twenty six years of experience to no avail.

I passed a first and a third class passenger, "You filth! You cannot come up here!"

"The ship is sinking you bastard! Where else am I going to go?"

"Into the sea!"

I went down from the first class decks and down to the third class. More boats were here on the Port side of the ship but the bow was already very much underwater. I saw Jack running into the ship and Cal following him in haste with Lovejoy at his heels. Where is Thomas? I was exasperated.

I ran into the ship, water was already overflowing the B decks so I knew that there was not much time left at all. I moved through the ship when I remembered my promise to Thomas _"_, you also must promise me that you will get on a lifebelt when the water reaches at most 'B deck.' Even if you don't see me get on the boats, do you understand?" _I hurried to the boat decks but I was terrified. Where in God's name was Thomas? By this time there was but two or three boats left, I saw Caleton on one and I ran to another one which was filling up quickly. The instant I stepped into that boat I felt a growing despair, sorrow and extreme worry and regret.

As the boat began to go down into the black sea which was about three yards away from the bottom of the boat, I knew this was wrong and with my heart pounding and tears streaming down my cheeks I dashed from the boat. I couldn't I just couldn't! The ship had minutes left. I must find Thomas.

I dashed through the A deck. Some men behind me were saying, "stop her!" and "please, come back, miss!" I didn't listen I just ran "Thomas!" I shouted I hurried into the dining room which was beginning to flood. "Oh God, Oh God!" I ran through the corridors which were being flooded with water rapidly. "Thomas!" I cried again, running frantically through the ship. I looked back out at the grand staircase. The ship was tipping and a huge wave of water with people swimming away from it entered the room. It flooded quickly. "Thomas!" I screamed. Tears streamed down my cheeks. I heard the pounding of footsteps and a loud shout from the smoking room "_!" I dashed through the dining room and to the smoking room where Thomas Andrews looking scared and almost trembling dashed towards me.

We embraced heavily and he kissed me on the lips, forehead and cheeks. Between kisses he scolded me like a child. "_! For God's sake! What are you doing? You didn't listen to me! The boats-go back to the boats you're running out of time."

"Oh God, Thomas! I couldn't leave you here alone! You can't expect me to escape with you here in Titanic alone!"

He kissed me, held my face in his hands. His body was so close. We kissed each other heavily in love, pure love. I was not scared in his arms I had lost myself in his very embrace and tears streamed down my cheek. I gazed into his face. Tears were gushing out his eyes, his hands held my waist. "There must be boats left!"

"I abandoned the last one, Thomas. I love you. I couldn't bear it!"

"_, you are so young, you had a chance to live your life and you threw it away for me!"

"I love you, God damnit! Thomas, you are my life. I can't continue without you by my side! You have shown me so much love and care-"

The ship made a loud crack, creaking came from the walls and the floor was tipping heavily.

"-I want to be with you forever, Thomas. I can't imagine going on without you! You're so good to me!"

"I never wanted this to happen! I am such a fool! I should have done so many things that I didn't do earlier! This ship would be safe, you would be safe."

I kissed him and said wiping the tears from his face, "It is happening, we can't change it." He nodded and gave a weak smile at me after I said, "You remember what you said to me when you told me this ship was mine?" My hand clasped the _Titanic_ necklace he had given me. "You said that as long as _Titanic_ sails the oceans and seas, I will be with your true love. I found you, you're my true love. When the ship sinks it means I will know then that I have truly found him and that he will be mine and only mine, forever."

The ship tipped steadily. "Come on we have to make this as quick as possible, you at least deserve that." He moved to the fireplace and lifted up a bit above him in his arms when the ship tilted so far that he could not hold me up with both hands he held the mantle with one hand and had one arm settled tightly around my tiny waist. "I held his face gently and kissed him. "I love you, Thomas. I have no regrets."

He looked at me and tried to smile. "When we go into the sea, do not let go of me. I will hold you. When you go in I want you to see me smiling not crying."

He kissed me and said, "I love you, _. You were the best thing that ever happened to me."

The smoking room beams split and a great moan uttered from the ship. I almost screamed. Then, it happened. The smoking room split in half we were thrown to the floor the fire went out by the splash of water I held onto Thomas as water flooded the room quickly. I tried to breathe, no air. My lungs were a cold hard box in my chest I didn't see Thomas I felt him though he was struggling like me. The ship's stern section was pulled back up and I felt myself losing consciousness rapidly my heart beat heavily and I felt Thomas' hands wrapped around me when it happened. My heart began to slow, my lungs stopped gasping for air and my mind went clear. I felt weakened and I sank. The last thing I felt that night besides the cold rush of water freezing my veins was Thomas' lips against my forehead.

When I awoke I was with Thomas on the Ship of Dreams not the ship that became a nightmare. He was dressed in his best dinner suit and I in my favorite golden dress. We were on the bow section of _Titanic _and he was holding my waist and my hand. "Come Josephine, in my flying machine. And it's up she goes, up she goes…"


End file.
